So far...

1) I'll be the first bride in my family to be married outdoors and not in a church. *this is a big deal to a few people in my family, but I always wanted to be married in a garden setting*

2)I'm having a guitarist to perform during the ceremony instead of an organist. I never liked the sound of an organ.

3)I'm considering walking down the aisle with BOTH of my parents instead of just my father. The only reason why I'm not completely for the idea is because Im afraid that having two people on my side will obstruct the view of my dress. *It's a shallow reason, but it's true*

4)I wont have a unity candle. I've never heard of them before planning my own wedding.

5)I wont have a recieving line.

6)I might not have a money dance.

Butterbean wrote:

So far...

1) I'll be the first bride in my family to be married outdoors and not in a church. *this is a big deal to a few people in my family, but I always wanted to be married in a garden setting*

2)I'm having a guitarist to perform during the ceremony instead of an organist. I never liked the sound of an organ.

3)I'm considering walking down the aisle with BOTH of my parents instead of just my father. The only reason why I'm not completely for the idea is because Im afraid that having two people on my side will obstruct the view of my dress. *It's a shallow reason, but it's true*

4)I wont have a unity candle. I've never heard of them before planning my own wedding.

5)I wont have a recieving line.

6)I might not have a money dance.

I think your non-traditions are just fine..I'm walking down the isle half way by myself and then FH is meeting me...boy you should have heard my caterer/decorator when I told her that(an older "church" sister) she thought that was a BIG NO NO...but hey the motto is "your day, your way" so do your thang!!

^^ I like that as well, but my dad would kill me. hehe
Yes, the older aunts..etc are the first ones to give their opinions.

Well I actually like your suggestion. I am doing what the heck I was because I am paying for it. This year I am doing things my way, and whoever don't like it dont have to be a part of my special day

housewife147 wrote:

Well I actually like your suggestion. I am doing what the heck I was because I am paying for it. This year I am doing things my way, and whoever don't like it dont have to be a part of my special day

Traditions, SMADitions! Forget it....What the heck is a tradition anyway? To HE%& with the other stuff!

We did an all-white tux, which a girl at the tux shop said was untraditional....My mom and stepdad escorted each other while I walked with dad....i SHOULD have done a money dance cause it would have been just something else to enjoy....Recieving line....what is that anyways? Very small bridal party....we WERE going to do it outside but I only did a church cause we changed the location of the city, and it ended up saving us even more $$, but It still went somewhere else....I had a soloist sing, and someone to play the song on the keyboard instead of using a CD or something....so every wedding is just DIFFERENT....the best ones are "Non-Traditional" anyways!

I'm skipping some and adding some that people in my circle have not seen.

Skipping:
1. BMs will all have different dresses - they will have styles to fit their body.
2. No unity candle, but we will be doing the unity sand ceremony.
3. No receiving line.
4. No money dance but I've never seen one in person anyway.

Adding:
1. Tasting of the 4 elements.
2. Monogrammed aisle runner.

I agree with House. I get so much flux because I'm using a venue that will allow outside food and liquor instead of a banquet hall. We're not getting a limo (we pay a nice note on our Mercedes M-class so why not use it?!) We're not having kids at the reception. It goes on but hey - MY DAY MY WAY! The only way I'd reconsider is if FH mentions something bothers HIM!

This was my second marriage. Someone told me that it's not "traditional" for a "second-time" Bride to wear white, I should wear Ivory. Whatever! My Day, My Way!

I think your non-traditions are just fine..I'm walking down the isle half way by myself and then FH is meeting me...boy you should have heard my caterer/decorator when I told her that(an older "church" sister) she thought that was a BIG NO NO...but hey the motto is "your day, your way" so do your thang!!


Yep, Your day your way!!
I'm skipping the broom.. just not my thing

I got ALOT of flack about not having a ring bearer also

soon2bmsj wrote:

I got ALOT of flack about not having a ring bearer also

That made me remember! We didn't have a ringbearer or flower girl (though I wanted one...FH didn't, and for some odd reason was SOOO opposed to it so we didn't do those)....We also had NO aisle runner....but this queen didn't need one....We made our own path of flowers!
Everyone always has something to say.....ugh!

We skipped receiving line, didn't do the money dance, all men had ivory tuxes with ivory vests but my dad wore black tux. My DH and his bestmen all walked the aisle, our children lit unity candle as well.

I didn't know that groomsmen aren't supposed to walk the aisle. At my friend's wedding, they arranged it to where we would take a groomsman by the arm and march together.

Butterbean wrote:

I didn't know that groomsmen aren't supposed to walk the aisle. At my friend's wedding, they arranged it to where we would take a groomsman by the arm and march together.

Groomsmen do walk the aisle but normally the groom and best men don't. They normally enter from the front of the church somewhere.

well FH and his guys are ALL walking the isle...since we don't have a center isle they will come down on the right and all of the women will come down on the left...guess this is something else people will be "shocked" about! LOL

When we got married, I didn't have a ring bearer or a flower girl. It worked out fine. I like the Vibride motto -- my day, my way!

FutureMrsKeepUp wrote:

1. Tasting of the 4 elements.

I never heard of this. What is it?

soon2bmsj wrote:

well FH and his guys are ALL walking the isle...since we don't have a center isle they will come down on the right and all of the women will come down on the left...guess this is something else people will be "shocked" about! LOL

Girl when I saw the video, my DH and Pastor walked right down that center aisle like they owned the place and they looked looked good! Each groomsman and BM came out alone and they looked great! They walked together in arms when they left the church. I couldn't care less if folks were shocked

SMADitions! LOL

1. My 12 year old walked me down
2. Dad did the ceremony
3. All 3 of my kids gave me away to my husband
4. I was an ALL golden bride
5. No recieving line
6. all music from a cd ...and you should have a the slack about that since I have 2 musicians in the family
7. DH lite a the unity candle for his dad
8. No money dance, did the ransom instead
9. No bouquet toss
10. No garder toss
11. No ring bearer
12. We had an "Honored Best Man" that actually wasn't there (deceased DH dad's)
13. I cooked all the reception food
14. We had pie and cake

Turiya wrote:

SMADitions! LOL

1. My 12 year old walked me down
2. Dad did the ceremony
3. All 3 of my kids gave me away to my husband
4. I was an ALL golden bride
5. No recieving line
6. all music from a cd ...and you should have a the slack about that since I have 2 musicians in the family
7. DH lite a the unity candle for his dad
8. No money dance, did the ransom instead
9. No bouquet toss
10. No garder toss
11. No ring bearer
12. We had an "Honored Best Man" that actually wasn't there (deceased DH dad's)
13. I cooked all the reception food
14. We had pie and cake

AWESOME!

Turiya wrote:

SMADitions! LOL

1. My 12 year old walked me down
2. Dad did the ceremony
3. All 3 of my kids gave me away to my husband
4. I was an ALL golden bride
5. No recieving line
6. all music from a cd ...and you should have a the slack about that since I have 2 musicians in the family
7. DH lite a the unity candle for his dad
8. No money dance, did the ransom instead
9. No bouquet toss
10. No garder toss
11. No ring bearer
12. We had an "Honored Best Man" that actually wasn't there (deceased DH dad's)
13. I cooked all the reception food
14. We had pie and cake

Dang T!!

I'm sure it's more ...but I got tired of listing them ...LOL

Butterbean wrote:

1. Tasting of the 4 elements.



I never heard of this. What is it?

Butterbean there's a whole thread on the 4 element ceremony i'll try to find it and bump it for you.

platinumstyle wrote:

This was my second marriage. Someone told me that it's not "traditional" for a "second-time" Bride to wear white, I should wear Ivory. Whatever! My Day, My Way!

I say it like this. My pay, my day , my way. Add that you paying for it so that folks who didnt chip in 40 cents to mail one invitation will be quiet. LOL

And there will be no broom at my ceremony. I am not even thinking about it and they cost tooo much, done.

Mycenae, I totally underestimated the cost of a broom myself. I tried to find a suitable bare broom at Micheal's but they are so puny.

Turiya wrote:

SMADitions! LOL


13. I cooked all the reception food

Woah!

Butterbean wrote:

Mycenae, I totally underestimated the cost of a broom myself. I tried to find a suitable bare broom at Micheal's but they are so puny.

I ordered my broom on one of the sites that were posted on here a while back for under $20 (i think it was $12), one of th ladies here got their broom favors from the same site. I bought the broom and added ribbon and some flowers to it myself.

I found the site and correction it cost $17.99

wedding brooms

here is a picture of mine
my broom

My older son who's actually in the Army National Guards will be walking me down the aisle.

No broom jumping for me (always hated that)

No money dance either

All ceremony music on a CD

Won't be having a receiving line

Adding:

The Unity Candles
The Blessing Of The Hands

Shy, I couldnt help but to check out your beautiful wedding pictures! I bet you had an unforgetable time. I love your broom and it's long straws. Thank you very much for that webpage.

I wonder if there is anyone who is having a recieving line. I figure that I can mingle without missing anyone.

Ginoue wrote:

No broom jumping for me (always hated that)

In all honesty, my mother really dont want us to do this. I'm on the fence on whether I should respect her wishes.

thank you Butterbean.
yes it was unforgetable.

1) I think I was also the first bride in my family to be married outdoors and not in a church. A few years ago when I thought about my big day, I thought about being married in the church where I was christened.



But I changed my mind this year when we got engaged because I love natural lighting and being near the ocean was such a beautiful setting. Besides, GOD is everywhere! Jesus didn't preach in a church.

2)A steel panist and a solosist performed during the ceremony instead of an organist. That was a dream of mine.

3)I did walk down the aisle with BOTH of my parents instead of just my father and wouldn't have had it any other way.



I love daddy, but mommy bore the pain of childbirth. LOL! She loved walking me down the aisle too and sharing the honor with my father. They've been equal partners all my life so there was no better way to show that. I did think about whether or not my gown would be seen well, but there was no reason to worry.

4)We had a unity sand ceremony instead of unity candle, which is very appropriate for an outdoor ceremony especially near the ocean.




5) We did not have a ring bearer and flower girl.

6) We didn't have a recieving line. There was no need with our small wedding. We greeted each and every guest at their table welcoming them to the reception.

7)We did not have a money dance.

8)We did not have a bouquet and garter toss. I didn't want to single-out single women at our reception. (no pun intended)

9)We did not have a head table. My mother was shocked! "You're not having a head table??!!! You have to have a head table."

"Nope. I don't have to have anything."

I told my mother this was going to be a semi-traditional, semi-formal wedding. No offense to anyone, but I think of head tables as stand-offish and too formal for the warm family atmosphere we wanted for our reception. Instead, my family, who was the wedding party, sat together at a round table for our first family dinner.



The best man, who came by himself, sat with us. The groomsman sat at another table with his wife.

10) We didn't have a "guestbook". We had a metal signature mat that was BEAUTIFUL."




11) Since our ceremony and reception was at the same venue, we skipped the limos. Been there, done that. It's not a big deal.

The result was everything we wanted.

I saw a broom at the dollar store tha just needed a ribbon but the groom and I discussed it and we dont want one. So there we go. lol. I wont be having a receiving line either I think as the reception hall discourages it and most brides mingle well enough without it.

Princess, I like what you have done for a guestbook. Seems like we are insync with a lot of our ideas. *wink*

I would love to do a garter toss, but since I'm going with a dress with a shorter hem, that idea is out. I'm thinking about doing a "bracelet toss" instead.

I don't know about seeking out the "something old/new/borrowed/blue". My family doesn't have any heirloom jewelry and I don't think that I will be borrowing anything from anyone. So this tradition is skipped for now.

Borrow something Butterbean. It is for good luck. Wink

Oh yeah, one more big thing. We saw each other most of the wedding day. He spent the night in my room at my parents' house. That's right. We got a license! No X-rated stuff though. LOL! So, he was there when I woke up in the morning, and we had breakfast together. He helped load-up the cars with the ceremony and reception stuff. He and his bestman helped us ladies decorate the reception room. They were a big help! I'm so proud of how everyone pitched-in with no drama at all. It was wonderful. We took pics on the beach together before the ceremony.

Faith in God is all we need, no superstitions. We were both very relaxed. My parents were probably more nervous. LOL!

Shy41208 wrote:

I found the site and correction it cost $17.99

wedding brooms

here is a picture of mine
my broom

My DH didn't even want to do a broom after I told him the origins of the tradition...His jacked up reply was : "We're not slaves though....?!"


Yeah I married a crazy one...

LMAO! My man .... He aint crazy Bumble ...he probably was thinking ...why do things that doesn't apply to US! And I can dig that ..

Bumblebeekee wrote:

I found the site and correction it cost $17.99

wedding brooms

here is a picture of mine
my broom


My DH didn't even want to do a broom after I told him the origins of the tradition...His jacked up reply was : "We're not slaves though....?!"


Yeah I married a crazy one...

Help dont' attack me but that is why I dont want a broom. Slavery is over. Lay it to rest just like chitterlings and colorism! I would like for my a troop of African dancers to perform or for out first dance to be a cake walk. LOL

VIPrincessBride wrote:

Oh yeah, one more big thing. We saw each other most of the wedding day. He spent the night in my room at my parents' house. That's right. We got a license! No X-rated stuff though. LOL! So, he was there when I woke up in the morning, and we had breakfast together. He helped load-up the cars with the ceremony and reception stuff. He and his bestman helped us ladies decorate the reception room. They were a big help! I'm so proud of how everyone pitched-in with no drama at all. It was wonderful. We took pics on the beach together before the ceremony.


Faith in God is all we need, no superstitions. We were both very relaxed. My parents were probably more nervous. LOL!

YOU were decorating on your wedding day. Unacceptable. I told my bride to stay out of it. One day at the Giant I did see a bride and several bridesmaids all dressed up picking up platters of coldcuts and cases of soda. I didnt like that. Where were the groomsmen, cousins, a distant relative? Felt bad for her.

1. We didn't have any receiving line, that would have took to frickin' long since we had like 2 million people at our wedding!.

2. We polished off half of the top layer of our cake at the hotel on the wedding night, and my mother and sisters at the rest while we were on our honeymoon (the greedy good-for-nuthin's lol) I was looking forward to getting another slice when we came back. lol

3. I didn't require my girls to have the same shoes, that actually shocked some people. I'm like please it's not that serious.

4. The only reason we got 2 limos was because we got a slammin' deal on it $150 per limo. If not for that, it would have been one limo for us...and every man for him/herself! Get to the reception hall however you can!

5. I ALMOST didn't get a veil (my mother almost had a heart-attack) again, the place I got my dress gave you like $150 towards an accessory. So just so my mother wouldn't fall out I decided to use it on a veil.

6. I didn't have any alcohol, this might not be considered a "tradition", but you should have heard all the grumbling and complaining from people when I announced this. You would think they were writing a sista a chk or something. Best be glad I'm feeding ya!....lol

7. I didn't concern myself with a "rehearsal dinner". I had absolutely nothing to do with that. I was content enough to have everyone come to the rehearsel, and everyone find their own place to eat. Had it not been for my hubby's family taking care of that, that's exactly what would have happened.

Girl go head. No rehearsal dinner. You coulda cooked them folks something. That's why they ate your cake up while you were gone. LOL. They was hungry. LOL

mycenae1918 wrote:

Girl go head. No rehearsal dinner. You coulda cooked them folks something. That's why they ate your cake up while you were gone. LOL. They was hungry. LOL

LOL....you read the post wrong....I did end up having a rehearsel dinner only because my hubby's people took care of everything. If not they would have to fend for themselves! lol and WE meaning my hubby and I ate half the cake up on our wedding night, not my guests...LOL....you are crazy!....

Alot of these things were about our funds....what we could afford, what was a "necessity" etc. The things at the "bottom" of the list, we just weren't going to worry about them especially for the sake of "tradition".

In addition to not having a flower girl and a ring bearer, my oldest brother walked me down the aisle.

No ringbearer - my son was a Jr. GM and he carried the chest.

No bouquet or garter toss, no toasts - mainly because by the time we thought about it we were ready to go!

Didn't save the top layer of the cake - but that was because it was smashed!

Did the unity sand ceremony instead of unity candle

BM chose their own shoe as long as it was gold. Wore their hair however they wanted as well.

Uneven bridal party. We had a MaOH, 3 BMs, 1 Jr. BM, a BM, 1 GM, and a Jr. GM. We also had 2 FGs for a total of 3 men and 7 women!

Aisle runner was out the entire ceremony.

No alcohol - everything was at the church.

We did a receiving line because we started late so several people weren't staying for the reception. Only DH and I were in it though.

DH and I woke up together (and broke up - LOL) and I snuck a peak on my way into the church as well.

No rehearsal dinner. After rehearsal we did the bouquets, centerpieces, and decorations and everyone went on their merry ways!

The BM AND GM walked DOWN THE AISLE with the pastor and DH. BM came in alone one at a time.

No limo.

Did not pay to have my makeup done. Don't wear it on the regular so they added some clear gloss, eye shadow and a little eyebrow pencil and I was ready!

I know that's right KeepUp. lol
-we didnt have a ring bearer really. My brother was supposed to do but the treasure chest was misplaced.
-DH did not walk in with Pastor( pastor wanted him to but he said no)
-DH's mother helped perform the ceremony (you ladies remember that story. lol)
-we also had an uneven wedding party (7 guys, 6 girls)
-no receiving line
-i did not have all of the items of something old, something new...
-the girls had different hairstyles and shoes.
-my mom and step dad walked me down
- i danced with my bio father and step father. DH danced with both his bio mom and step mom.

soontobebride wrote:

Girl go head. No rehearsal dinner. You coulda cooked them folks something. That's why they ate your cake up while you were gone. LOL. They was hungry. LOL



LOL....you read the post wrong....I did end up having a rehearsel dinner only because my hubby's people took care of everything. If not they would have to fend for themselves! lol and WE meaning my hubby and I ate half the cake up on our wedding night, not my guests...LOL....you are crazy!....

Alot of these things were about our funds....what we could afford, what was a "necessity" etc. The things at the "bottom" of the list, we just weren't going to worry about them especially for the sake of "tradition".

I know but you didnt intend to feed them folks. LOL. I am just kidding. The wedding I was in had no rehearsal dinner and I didnt say anything. Funds are tight and whenever people decide to make that commitment, I support them.

FutureMrsKeepUp wrote:

No ringbearer - my son was a Jr. GM and he carried the chest.

No bouquet or garter toss, no toasts - mainly because by the time we thought about it we were ready to go!

Didn't save the top layer of the cake - but that was because it was smashed!

Did the unity sand ceremony instead of unity candle

BM chose their own shoe as long as it was gold. Wore their hair however they wanted as well.

Uneven bridal party. We had a MaOH, 3 BMs, 1 Jr. BM, a BM, 1 GM, and a Jr. GM. We also had 2 FGs for a total of 3 men and 7 women!

Aisle runner was out the entire ceremony.

No alcohol - everything was at the church.

We did a receiving line because we started late so several people weren't staying for the reception. Only DH and I were in it though.

DH and I woke up together (and broke up - LOL) and I snuck a peak on my way into the church as well.

No rehearsal dinner. After rehearsal we did the bouquets, centerpieces, and decorations and everyone went on their merry ways!

The BM AND GM walked DOWN THE AISLE with the pastor and DH. BM came in alone one at a time.

No limo.

Did not pay to have my makeup done. Don't wear it on the regular so they added some clear gloss, eye shadow and a little eyebrow pencil and I was ready!

I told my girl to just do her face to look like herself and she looked radiant. Looking like yourself is best on your big day. All brides are beautiful.

I told my girl to just do her face to look like herself and she looked radiant. Looking like yourself is best on your big day. All brides are beautiful.
Girl the lies you tell my dh and i went to his cousins wedding and sugar when those doors opened it looked like a gorrilla in a dress
i will try to post the pics but her dress was really pretty though damn i know to the corner!!!!!! Im going