Is it inappropriate to ask for cash instead of gifts. We just had a housewarming and really don't need another thing.

djalonaylor wrote:

Is it inappropriate to ask for cash instead of gifts. We just had a housewarming and really don't need another thing.

Welcome djalonaylor!

Send the word around through trusted family members if etiquette is very important to you. However, the new trend in weddings, is "my day my way" which is one of our mottos around here, and there are nice ways to state them on an invite-if you choose to go that route. Many ladies here have had the exact same situation and I am sure they could provide feedback as to what they did.

However, consider a few things: Many people like to purchase very expensive gifts for weddings, and if given the chance to give cash, people have been known to give less cash-but would have spent more on a gift. People are like that.

Also, look in your new home and see if there are some nice pieces you would love to have or replace. Do you have a nice casual or formal dining set? Did you get your tablecloths? Do a really good inventory-you may just have a registry with a very short list vs the traditional.....Though my DH didn't really think we needed China, he picked a very expensive set for fun, and was tickled when we got 10 place settings worth over 150.00 per set! So it will definitely be an heirloom to pass down to our kids. I am very excited about starting that tradition-since our family didn't do things like that. We also picked up some very tasteful dinner pieces, crystal, and vases, and beautiful sheet sets that I would not have spent on my own as they were very expensive.

We did get a lot of cash too.

However, whatever you do, DO NOT ask for gift cards-my brother wanted to do the same thing you did, but asked for gift cards for the flexibility of buying what they wanted and ended up with too many from the 3 stores they registered at. Then after they moved into their new house-purchased 6 months after the wedding-there were lots of things he remembered later on that he could have put on his registry at Home Depot for example-Tools, Drills, etc. This is non-traditional-but a good way to reign male guests in.

There are also some very unique options in lieu of gifts such as starting a honeymoon registry where people buy "gift cards" worth 100 or more dollars to go towards your honeymoon (Sandels does this), and also you may also want to look into opening an account where people can buy bonds for you. Home Depot and Furniture stores have wedding registries for buying nice tools, equipment, grills, and furniture for your new home. So you have lots of options if you are concerned with just asking for $$!

Welcome djalonaylor,
We are asking our family for visa gift card instead of gifts because we are getting married on a cruise ship and we would have to pay a fee for each gift. My family loves the idea because they don't have to shop for a gift.
Here a few wording examples you can use. I hope this help

Example one
In our house we have the things
That living together normally brings
Most household items we

Great examples queenbee!

Welcome to the sisterhood djalonaylor. You've received some great advices regarding the cash thing. I agree with Bumble though, FH and I registered for 3 separate sets of China and other things to fill our formal dining wear including tablecloths, napkins and rings, etc... Why not create a formal registry since you have all the casual things for your home already. You will receive cash gifts because people generally like to give generously at weddings, but they also like to go to the store and print out registries and buy from your list too, so think about it and congrats on your upcoming day!!!

Ginoue wrote:

Welcome to the sisterhood djalonaylor. You've received some great advices regarding the cash thing. I agree with Bumble though, FH and I registered for 3 separate sets of China and other things to fill our formal dining wear including tablecloths, napkins and rings, etc... Why not create a formal registry since you have all the casual things for your home already. You will receive cash gifts because people generally like to give generously at weddings, but they also like to go to the store and print out registries and buy from your list too, so think about it and congrats on your upcoming day!!!

We always want to get a chance to get what we want but I think that is just such a great opportunity to get something new and fresh like an heirloom or formal piece like Ginuoe suggested! We are looking forward to your thoughts on that!

I recommend Following Miss Manner's Advice:
What is the proper way to
request cash in lieu of gifts? Miss Manners’ reply: Sit on the floor with a hat turned upside down
beside you. What about a cash bar at the reception? Better to serve punch than charge guests for
drinks.
Panhandling for cash at your own wedding is the lowest of the low class.