I hear ya Ivy -- I don't miss that part of planning at all! Good luck to you Ivy and all the other ladies with your Guest Lists -- I almost went crazy behind mine -- LOL!!!!
Delight yourself in The Lord & He will give you the desires of your heart!Ps 37
I agree.... I am getting married in Jamaica. I thought it would be easier... BOY was I wrong... I want it to be simple. The guest can sit where every they like. The problem is inviting the guest. We know that not everyone will be able to attend. But we sent everyone an invitations a year in advance so they could make arrangements to go. But we are still getting a lot of drama from everyone about the cost.It really is cheaper for us to have our wedding this way. I have really gotten FRUSTRATED with all of the questions. I feel like telling everyone to just stay home (LOL) OOPS I'm sorry I didn't mean to vent. I guess this is one of my sore spots. Thanks for listening....
Im also going through a nightmare with my guest list. FH swares Im the one thats suppose to get his families info address and so on, remind you half of these people I never seen or spoke to a day of my life...I dont know what to do about that one.
I must agree that the guest list was the most stressful part of the planning so far. Everything else has been ok, but for some reason, when it came to making that guest list, I was ready to pull my hair out...lol!! My FH couldn't understand why I was so stressed out behind it, but it was very difficult. I finally figured it out after a few weeks of going back and forth with all of the names. Good luck to those of you working on your guest lists! It is very frustrating, but you will figure it out eventually. And sensationablyhappy, I'm not sure where your FH is coming from on that one, expecting you to get all of the info/addresses on his family's side! My FH just had his mother gather all of his side's information. Maybe you two can create a list and designate someone responsible on his side of the family to gather the addresses for you.
We finished our guest list only to have my mom remembering certain church people and what now. She has agreed to pay for the the reception but is not happy about it because of all the people she feels she "has to invite"!
" sensationablyhappy, I'm not sure where your FH is coming from on that one, expecting you to get all of the info/addresses on his family's side! My FH just had his mother gather all of his side's information. Maybe you two can create a list and designate someone responsible on his side of the family to gather the addresses for you.
[/quote]
TiffyB, I didn't mention the fact that he is deployed in Iraq and wont be home until january. so its hard for him to call his side of the family,Just once in a while, But like you said he should get one appointed person from his side to get all the names and addresses for him so he does not have to keep calling back and forth. Either way he will be home soon so there will be no more excuses cause im not having it,lol.
[quote="sensationablyhappy"]
TiffyB, I didn't mention the fact that he is deployed in Iraq and wont be home until january. so its hard for him to call his side of the family,Just once in a while, But like you said he should get one appointed person from his side to get all the names and addresses for him so he does not have to keep calling back and forth. Either way he will be home soon so there will be no more excuses cause im not having it,lol.
[/quote]
Wow, I didn't realize he was deployed in Iraq. I'm sure you mentioned that, I probably just didn't realize it at the time. I can understand a little more now why he is asking you to gather his family's information, but that doubles the work for you. But yes, designating a person on his side of the family to gather names and addresses will take a load off of you, and save him from calling back and forth as you stated. It's great that he is coming home in January!! As you said, he will be home so he will have no excuses!!
This was definitely the HARDEST thing to do. To this day I still think of people I could have invited but didn't cause I was trying to make room for family. So many of both our family members didn't even show up-I got pissed because we were not told they were not coming (even worse, over 75% didn't even RSVP...we had to call...and about 50% of them gave us a verbal confirmation)...but by making room for them we x-ed out some of our friends due to space constraints.... Cause there are always some people who "show up" but came "so far to attend" and you don't want to turn them around....Lets just be real.... This is including any vendors, children, hostesses/ushers, and wedding party members...cause people often leave them out with the intention to feed, and then have to come back and re-calculate....
My DH (at the last minute-like 1 week before our set deadline to send invites) finally got his but in gear and got addresses and names together. So they are SLOW...but I left his side totally up to him...whoever wasn't invited was on him....
To all those doing destination weddings...1 year is more than enough time for guests who were notified to get it together! You are NOT obligated to accomodate ANYONE! Only people who should be accomodated are those who make the trip...and that can be handled when they get there! Its just too bad for them...Its YOUR wedding and trying to make your wedding "just so" for others is aggravating & EXHAUSTING....we ended up getting burned for doing this because even though only 125 out of the 160 something invitees actually RSVP'd.. only 110 came....But we paid for 135 people (125 + an extra 10 more plates (which is traditional) "just in case" extra's showed up who were invited but were unconfirmed by the deadline)....so we ate the cost of like 15 plates....and depending on your cost/plate...its nothing to sneeze at...esp you ladies with $35.00 pp!
If I had a choice, I'd have copied my brother (but I think he learned from our mistake). My brother over-invited (225 invited/220 capacity, 215 confirmed and paid for, and had like 190-195 attend including those invited but didn't RSVP). But (and this won't work if your family is known to show up in droves unannounced), he didn't eat so much of his cost like we did.
I hope hearing my aggravation will help someone avoid aggravation.....I think knowing how your family works when it comes to events helps...Like I knew our families wouldn't do online RSVP (no computers for many), or much less mail the thing back (though we tried to give them the chance to mail it back OR even call US by giving them our cell numbers)...but I knew we'd be calling them to confirm...like we're the daggone Dr's office...Ugh!
That I despise with a passion beyond all passions, working on a guest list.
I absolutely hate it.
That's all, just needed to vent, lol
Real love requires a minimum of emotion and a maximum of the will - Bishop Keith W. Reed, Sr.
Wait til you get to the seating chart! ...LOL
Vent on my sister ..:)
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And then comes the Thank You Cards !!! LOL
"I'm a work in progress, God is not through me yet"
I am despising people already asking me "where's my invitation"??
I hear ya Ivy -- I don't miss that part of planning at all! Good luck to you Ivy and all the other ladies with your Guest Lists -- I almost went crazy behind mine -- LOL!!!!
Delight yourself in The Lord & He will give you the desires of your heart!Ps 37
At least you HAVE a guest list to work with! I'm still waiting on FH to give me his!
[quote="FutureMrsKeepUp"]At least you HAVE a guest list to work with! I'm still waiting on FH to give me his!
[/quote]
Good luck Future, I had to corner mine and threaten him -- LOL!!!
Delight yourself in The Lord & He will give you the desires of your heart!Ps 37
Because FH lives overseas and has a horrible memory, i already see myself getting blamed for forgetting to invite SOMEone.
I agree.... I am getting married in Jamaica. I thought it would be easier... BOY was I wrong... I want it to be simple. The guest can sit where every they like. The problem is inviting the guest. We know that not everyone will be able to attend. But we sent everyone an invitations a year in advance so they could make arrangements to go. But we are still getting a lot of drama from everyone about the cost.It really is cheaper for us to have our wedding this way. I have really gotten FRUSTRATED with all of the questions. I feel like telling everyone to just stay home (LOL) OOPS I'm sorry I didn't mean to vent. I guess this is one of my sore spots. Thanks for listening....
ThefutureMrs.K Johnson
Im also going through a nightmare with my guest list. FH swares Im the one thats suppose to get his families info address and so on, remind you half of these people I never seen or spoke to a day of my life...I dont know what to do about that one.
I must agree that the guest list was the most stressful part of the planning so far. Everything else has been ok, but for some reason, when it came to making that guest list, I was ready to pull my hair out...lol!! My FH couldn't understand why I was so stressed out behind it, but it was very difficult. I finally figured it out after a few weeks of going back and forth with all of the names. Good luck to those of you working on your guest lists! It is very frustrating, but you will figure it out eventually. And sensationablyhappy, I'm not sure where your FH is coming from on that one, expecting you to get all of the info/addresses on his family's side! My FH just had his mother gather all of his side's information. Maybe you two can create a list and designate someone responsible on his side of the family to gather the addresses for you.
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FH side refuses to give me a guest list...MIL said she has no clue on who to invite and who would actually show up.
nhamer615
In that case -your job is easier, only your side will be there! ...:)
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We finished our guest list only to have my mom remembering certain church people and what now. She has agreed to pay for the the reception but is not happy about it because of all the people she feels she "has to invite"!
Wedding Ticker from WhenIsMyWedding.com
" sensationablyhappy, I'm not sure where your FH is coming from on that one, expecting you to get all of the info/addresses on his family's side! My FH just had his mother gather all of his side's information. Maybe you two can create a list and designate someone responsible on his side of the family to gather the addresses for you.
[/quote]
TiffyB, I didn't mention the fact that he is deployed in Iraq and wont be home until january. so its hard for him to call his side of the family,Just once in a while, But like you said he should get one appointed person from his side to get all the names and addresses for him so he does not have to keep calling back and forth. Either way he will be home soon so there will be no more excuses cause im not having it,lol.
[quote="sensationablyhappy"]
TiffyB, I didn't mention the fact that he is deployed in Iraq and wont be home until january. so its hard for him to call his side of the family,Just once in a while, But like you said he should get one appointed person from his side to get all the names and addresses for him so he does not have to keep calling back and forth. Either way he will be home soon so there will be no more excuses cause im not having it,lol.
[/quote]
Wow, I didn't realize he was deployed in Iraq. I'm sure you mentioned that, I probably just didn't realize it at the time. I can understand a little more now why he is asking you to gather his family's information, but that doubles the work for you. But yes, designating a person on his side of the family to gather names and addresses will take a load off of you, and save him from calling back and forth as you stated. It's great that he is coming home in January!! As you said, he will be home so he will have no excuses!!
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www.mywedding.com/kyleandtiffany
This was definitely the HARDEST thing to do. To this day I still think of people I could have invited but didn't cause I was trying to make room for family. So many of both our family members didn't even show up-I got pissed because we were not told they were not coming (even worse, over 75% didn't even RSVP...we had to call...and about 50% of them gave us a verbal confirmation)...but by making room for them we x-ed out some of our friends due to space constraints.... Cause there are always some people who "show up" but came "so far to attend" and you don't want to turn them around....Lets just be real.... This is including any vendors, children, hostesses/ushers, and wedding party members...cause people often leave them out with the intention to feed, and then have to come back and re-calculate....
My DH (at the last minute-like 1 week before our set deadline to send invites) finally got his but in gear and got addresses and names together. So they are SLOW...but I left his side totally up to him...whoever wasn't invited was on him....
To all those doing destination weddings...1 year is more than enough time for guests who were notified to get it together! You are NOT obligated to accomodate ANYONE! Only people who should be accomodated are those who make the trip...and that can be handled when they get there! Its just too bad for them...Its YOUR wedding and trying to make your wedding "just so" for others is aggravating & EXHAUSTING....we ended up getting burned for doing this because even though only 125 out of the 160 something invitees actually RSVP'd.. only 110 came....But we paid for 135 people (125 + an extra 10 more plates (which is traditional) "just in case" extra's showed up who were invited but were unconfirmed by the deadline)....so we ate the cost of like 15 plates....and depending on your cost/plate...its nothing to sneeze at...esp you ladies with $35.00 pp!
If I had a choice, I'd have copied my brother (but I think he learned from our mistake). My brother over-invited (225 invited/220 capacity, 215 confirmed and paid for, and had like 190-195 attend including those invited but didn't RSVP). But (and this won't work if your family is known to show up in droves unannounced), he didn't eat so much of his cost like we did.
I hope hearing my aggravation will help someone avoid aggravation.....I think knowing how your family works when it comes to events helps...Like I knew our families wouldn't do online RSVP (no computers for many), or much less mail the thing back (though we tried to give them the chance to mail it back OR even call US by giving them our cell numbers)...but I knew we'd be calling them to confirm...like we're the daggone Dr's office...Ugh!
We've been Happily Married 2 Years and Counting:)
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