PRE-MARITAL COUNSELING

Yes it is a requirement if you are being married by a reverand or minister. I am looking fwd to mine

I would love to attend pre-marital counseling.Right now,we're looking for a church "home".

I think it's a great idea. My HB & I did it and it was a breeze. I also hear that it's a great way to work out and unmentioned issues BEFORE you jump the broom.

My FH and I are having pre-marital counseling....and like the other say....it's great. A good way to deal with things which might not seem like issues now, but may become some when you are married. I know it has brought some things to light between me and my FH.....I love it and I think if you can everyone should do it before marriage...

Definitely a good way to go. We start this month. We are also part of a married and engaged couples class at my church. We love it. The classes are interesting because instead of being one on one with the Pastor, you get to hear other people discuss problems you may be going through, PLus we can see what we have to look forward to in listening to the newly married couples.....Plus we get to fellowship with like minds. We do parties and have a cruise and a ladies night out coming up. The men do game nights, BBQ's and stuff. Its great because lets face it: "Single folks" just don't understand all the time.

Pre-marital counseling was required for the church that we got married at. I would've gone anyway if it wasn't. My husband and I enjoyed it so much, it was such a blessing. I would definitely recommend that everyone attend some form of pre-marital counseling.

[quote="Bumblebeekee"] Its great because lets face it: "Single folks" just don't understand all the time.[/quote]

I know that's right! When you're married, the game & the rules change.

My FH and I have been going to counseling for a little over a month now and it is working. We are using my insurance (my EAP from work allowed us to have 4 free sessions). It does bring up a lot of unforseen issues and it helps with our communication barriers as well.

We love it too. A lot of times people think you have "problems/issues" when you tell them you are in counseling, but I think it is a great thing to make the marriage work!

[quote="DWBride"] A lot of times people think you have "problems/issues" when you tell them you are in counseling, but I think it is a great thing to make the marriage work!
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So true DW!

It's great to hear you enjoyed it.

07 Bride,
I have something I want to say too you. Please take this in the kind way in which it's being delivered and this in no way reflects on anyone else's advice. First I want to say good luck to you and FH. Marriage is not a thing to go into lightly. It is hard work for people no matter what age they are. So you need to really be sure. People can outgrow 1 another. The 1st time I got married, He was 22 I was 19. We were in love and had 3 beautiful children together. 17 years later, we had nothing in common. He still was the same person he was at 22 and I had grown tremendously. We are good friends now but it took a lot to get us here. We always tried to put what was best for the kids 1st and foremost.
Now, my 1st real boyfriend was when I was 13-14 I loved everything about him and he felt the same about me. We felt like the flip side of the same coin. It was Love at first site and we were inseperable. I have never felt such peace as when I was with him. We were so serious our parents seperated us and told us we wld get over it and we were too young to know what we were feeling. 20 something years later-we have been bck together for 6 years and everything still feels like it did at 14. We complete each other's sentences and thoughts. If he's thinking it, I usually say it and vice versa. There are so many times when I call him on the phone because something in me knows he needs me to. I can many times say in my mind, baby call and he does. He calls me and says yes baby which lets me know We had it right from the beginning. This was the 1st person I gave my self to and I was his 1st experience.
We knew we were meant to be, ordained by God. God made me for this man and this man for me. Now the kicker comes in where I don't doubt God at all but every now and again I wonder if we had stayed together over the years, wld we have still been together? Or did we need time to grow up seperatly to be able to appreciate and give more to the relationship. I guess what I'm trying to say is you may have it right on point. You know yourself better than anyone else however,There is no rush. Take your time be sure. Some things are easy to get into but harder to get out of. WE take marriage to lightly these days and go about with the attitude that if it does nt work we let it go and that's nt the way it's supposed to be. We take a vow b4 God to love honor and cherish thru everything until death and people just do it over and over and over again like it's nothing. If we take our time and get to know the person maybe we won't make those mistakes. The minor things you dislike on day 1 will turn into huge things you hate on day 2 thousand and 1. Love you all

Where are the tissues? That was beautiful and uplifting Taj!!!! Little do you know, we have a lot in common.

Awesome advice Taj -- your story is similar to mine as well.

That's why we all are supposed to get together! Don't mess around and make me start organizing yall know i'm anal and crazy:).

I have not had the opportunity to have any marital counseling yet, however we are both looking forward to it.

[quote="TAJMOM"]That's why we all are supposed to get together! Don't mess around and make me start organizing yall know i'm anal and crazy:).
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Girl, please set it up. I was supposed to have this set up month's ago. Messing with me, it will not get done until 2008.

Tajmom~ That was lovely!

Thank you DW

07 Bride, It seems to me you are very mature and already realize who is the beginning, midddle and end in your life and love. So I'm sure you guys will be fine. Good luck and God Bless. Now on w/the wedding plans.

So NJ brides, How does Mon Feb 19 sound? We can meet at Iberias on Ferry st. in Newark 3pm. Please send your phone # and e-mail address on a private note. Good Bad?

[quote="TAJMOM"]Thank you DW

How does Mon Feb 19 sound?
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Raise a glass for Musik, that's my birthday.

Taj, a weekend would be much better for me. I have to work on Monday, Feb 19.

I wish I was going to visit my sister in Jersey at that time (she lives in Newark) so I could meet you all too.

My bday is the 13th so I would love to celebrate with my vibride girls. That Monday is tricky though. I have a 50/50 chance of being off.

I am going to Atlanta that weekend(2/19/07)to pick up my wedding rings. Do you ladies plan on meeting again?

We do our first pre-marital counseling with my Pastor before church tomorrow and I will be honest ya'll I am a little nervous....
My Pastor is like 34 and is so cool, and he's like my dad in many ways (I was nervous when I introduced FH, but they got a long great, and he knew about him long ago). However, I worry that if we bring up an issue, he might be like...oh ya'll ain't ready....I don't know.....Any advice from those who have started pre-marital counseling?

We haven't started yet (lawd knows we need it sooner than later) my hope is to attend counseling sessions that open up for honest discussion. Anyone who is familiar w/counseling of any type would agree that the counselor/therapist rarely if ever gives advise or offers opinions. A good session would include you two coming to your own conclusions based on what was discussed.
I doubt that he would say anything like that. I bet yall are going to love it. Please let us know how it turns out. I can't wait to start ours.(I too am a little nervous)